STORY 22
At the age of twenty-four, in a state of suicidal despair, my daughter told me she had been sexually assaulted by her father, my ex-husband, as a child. When my daughter told me of her father’s assaults, my immediate reaction was to go to the police and press criminal charges. However, my intention to press charges was chastised and shamed by family members and friends and met with overwhelming despair from my daughter.
Later, when my daughter was thirty years old, and after intensive therapy, she started to seek justice in the provincial courts. Her lawyer said her case, “sexually assaulted by her father as a child and as an adult”, would never go to criminal court due to lack of evidence. The lawyer recommended that my daughter pursue a charge through civil court. During that civil case in 1997, my daughter was forced to sign a Nondisclosure Agreement (NDA) in exchange for a cash settlement.
As a result of the civil case and the signing of the NDA, my daughter has never been able to own or speak of her own trauma, a fact that continues to affect her life to the present day.
In 2015, my daughter’s father died. My daughter was completely omitted from her father’s obituary and the will and estate. My daughter petitioned the courts, and the executor of her father’s estate, her brother, and my youngest son, to have the NDA released. My daughter was denied by the Justice on the bench, citing ‘lack of evidence of psychological harm caused by the NDA._’.
Today, legal mechanisms and loopholes such as NDAs and Alter Ego Trusts continue to traumatize my daughter, as well as too many other daughters, sons, wives, mothers, sisters, brothers, families, communities, directly or indirectly. But my efforts to campaign for change regarding the use of NDAs in the case of the sexual assault of children and adults, and the closure of legal-loop holes such as the Alter Ego Trust have mostly gone unattended.
Over an eighteen month period, I have committed to relentless advocacy including pleading to Canada’s parliament, the Senate, and Canada’s Standing Committee for the Status of Women members, and every representative in my province’s legislative assembly. For every hundred letters I sent, I received a single response. The following are the responses I received from a member of the Senate and a provincial Cabinet Minister:
“FROM A MEMBER OF THE SENATE
I “support all reasonable measures the government brings forward to support victims of criminal acts, especially victims of sexual assault’.
FROM A CABINET MINISTER IN MY PROVINCIAL GOVERNMENT
‘there are complex legal and policy issues that need to be addressed to ensure that a ban on the use of non-disclosure agreements would achieve intended objectives. Ministry staff continue to monitor other jurisdictions .”
In July 2021, I learned that a member of the Green Party of Prince Edward Island, Lynne Lund, intends to put forward legislation banning the misuse of NDAs in September 2021. My local federal candidate has indicated that, if elected, she will bring the matter to Parliament. I hope that this is the beginning of the end of the misuse of NDAs, and that my daughter can someday receive some form of justice for her trauma and the silencing of her voice.
